Friday, February 17, 2012

I Am A Bad Dad



At a family gathering recently, the banter turned political and I divulged to all that I was teaching my children that it was OK to cherry pick which laws we would follow and which laws we could ignore if it felt good and was convenient.

Yes.

Parties at my house are off the hook and uplifting affairs.

Anyhoo...my elderly mother, who also recently said, "I don't know you anymore," was aghast that I would tell my children such things.

The furrowed brow look was exquisite.

I replied, "Look...our government passes so many laws now that one can't step outside one's own front door without committing a felony."

"Besides that, our government doesn't adhere to its own laws.  Why should I?  Being a law-abiding citizen only goes so far when the laws are ridiculous, unprincipled, unfairly applied, and un-Constitutional."

"Therefore, I'll do what I think is right based on my principles.  After that, what happens happens.  I'll take my lumps, and hand out a few too, God willing." 

"WOLVERINES!"

"Who needs another beer?"

Mom just shook her head in horror and disgust.

Fine...that means more beer for me.

God love her.

I do too.

I wonder what my late father would think?

Sucks to be me, I guess, but when I'm not beating them, my kids think I'm a hoot.


Sometimes.

Maybe.


8 comments:

  1. Oh Damn you better get that kid a Zippo!

    China
    III

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow word was unkle Called (grumpy unk)? Thinking bout our buddy!

    China
    III

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dude,
    Your hair is really getting long in that first pic! Just wait until your haz endorsements come up,you'll be flagged for sure now.
    Welcome to the jungle,keep the greasy side down.

    CIII

    ReplyDelete
  4. Heh ... everytime you write "Wolverines" sarah Brady cries !!

    ReplyDelete
  5. GO Walter!
    Yeah, Iknow how it is! When I bring up politics at a family gathering you can almost hear the crickets chirping. My step Father will chime in with me, my Mother looks dismayed, my sister turns her mother supported head, BIL just keeps that same old blank look on his face. Now at my Fathers place it's alot different.

    ReplyDelete
  6. if killing zombies is wrong, i don't wanna be right.

    we need to get you to a race or something, you are all fucked up these days.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 9rows:

    I know, right?

    Good news is that I'm starting to get the itch again...what with Daytoner going on and the NECKAR boys getting busy.

    The Wheldon thing kinda put a damper on the whole mess, but I'm kinda fired up to see the new Indy car run in anger.

    I think these are positive developments in my personal growth.

    Don't you?

    Please stay out of bus stations.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Firstly, the whole "law-following" thang... agreed.
    Ayn Rand said it best: "The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren't enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for men to live without breaking laws."

    Secondly, your captcha "words" cracked me up! "legul badz". Fitting. And funneh.

    ReplyDelete

Feel free to comment away with your bad-ass selves.

Cursing and foul language is fine...even encouraged here. In fact, I think cussing is fucking wonderful.

Just remember...this is MY house, and I will not be insulted or maliciously messed with here.

Good-natured ribbing is cool, but if you and I don't have some kind of previous relationship, you had best mind your fucking manners or I will relegate you to the intardnets dustbin for being a cunt.

To know me is to love me.

Or something.

Maybe.