Monday, June 3, 2013

Shaving Part Two...sorta

I'm thinking about trying the safety razor thing.

I started shaving with a Trac II.  That's what I always used and was accustomed to. 

When my boys started shaving, I was somehow "forced" to switch to another blade...this one with three blades in the head.

WTF?  Three blades?

OK...so I finally got somewhat used to the three-blade shit, but yesterday I had to use a different one because I was out of the three blade heads.

Well...fuck me if this latest one didn't have like five or seven or twenty fucking blades in it!

What the fuck am I gonna do?  Bush-hog the back forty?

Make a multitude of musloid snuff videos for YouTubes?

No, motherfuckers.  I'm shaving.

Just shaving!

The head on this monstrosity is so wide it covers the entire area between my nose and my upper lip, so I can't even shave the area directly under my nostril openings without slicing my nose clean off and requiring the services of goonish government agents to save me from bleeding out in my almost nearly completed new bathroom.

I think that's it.

The hair and whisker removal industry is in cahoots with Marxist/lib/socialists to destroy this country.

It's a commie plot to make anybody who shaves dependent on government and make us weak and gay.

That settles it.  


I'm definitely going to try the safety razor.

Cue Lee Greenwood.

God bless Amurica...

9 comments:

  1. I switched a couple years ago. The thing about a safety razor, and even more so with a cuthroat razor, is that it forces you to take your time. If you hurry, you will bleed. Keep a package of those 9-blade thingums around for when you need to shave in two minutes or less. Oh, an buy yourself a handful of styptic pencils.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Better yet, just stop.

    I gave up shaving circa 1969. Wife got over it. Daughter hasn't seen my face.

    No expenses, no bleeding ... Happy Happy, Joy Joy.

    Hans
    in the NC woods

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cue Lee Greenwood.

      God bless Amurica...

      :)!

      Delete
  3. See how easy it is to do a post everyday with that zoomie wit???????
    Ya I had a 4 bladed thingy sent in the mail a while back, the damn thing was huge...........;-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bryn, Isle of Anglesey, UKJune 23, 2013 at 3:45 PM

    Switched back to a DE razor some time ago, have not regretted it at all. Yes, it takes a little longer (don't even think of rushing it! - ask me how I know this..... ouch.....) but it's worth the effort and a damn sight cheaper than the multi-blade techno-slicers.

    I re-started with a Merkur 42 (replica 1904 Gillette), and I'm using Merkur blades at the moment. I did try a Feather blade in the 1st week, and found out the hard way why the shaving advice forums say to stay clear until you're used to a DE razor again... more ouch, more mopping of blood off the sink.....

    Very happy with mine now, especially since it was an "unwanted gift" bargain on Ebay!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey Zoomie, off topic, but if'n ya gots the time and inclination, could ya work some of your graphical magic fer lil' ol' me? I want a "Big Brass Balls" award to bestow on someone who truly has brass elephant balls. Hell, on anyone who has 'em. Mull it over, would ya?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Send me some ideas via my email in my profile.

      Delete
  6. Been shaving with my Great Grandpa's Gillette Milord for about three years now...... Mever going back. It's a real freakin' machine.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Straight razor
    buy a good one

    Tall learning curve but all you need to buy is soap thereafter.

    ReplyDelete

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