Not Best Practices Volume One

The Sad Saga Of Rocky Raccoon

Ok.

So, some dumbass (me) left the garage door open a few nights ago.

The next morning I find shit and piss all over the place and a raccoon and a cat holed up in my garage.

I persuade the cat to leave, but Rocky will have none of it.  He has gorged himself on dry cat chow and is fat and happy and has taken up refuge in my gutted, derelict 1968 Chevelle project car from hell.

Rocky's a big motherfucker, and he doesn't want to leave.

Fuck.

I really don't want to hurt the dumb-ass critter because I am a man of peace like Gandhi or Mandela and all of God's creatures are sacred.

So I call up a work buddy to see if he has a live trap I can borrow.  He does, and I go over and get it.  The trap looks a little too small, but Rocky hasn't eaten in a couple of days and I figure he's gonna be getting desperate and he just might try to force his fat ass into the trap for some free goodies.

I bait the trap with canned cat food and put it in the trunk of the Chevelle.  Rocky's in the passenger compartment, but since there is no interior he can move freely from there to the closed trunk space.

Well, this morning I get up to check the trap, and this is what I see when I go outside.

Somehow, Rocky escaped the car and tried to wedge himself under the garage door and got stuck so tightly that he probably asphyxiated himself.  He was cold and stiff and very much graveyard dead.

Fuck.

I tried to do the right thing and be humane, and the ignant motherfucker offed himself.

Stoopid.  You shoulda taken the deal.  Now look atcha.  All dead an' shit...

I am sorry, Rocky.

Just Today...

I'm sorry.

I Am Sorry. Really.

Questions

Being armed doesn't equate to being violent.

Being armed isn't violent until a trigger is pulled.

Being armed is prudent and proper and polite.

Be polite.

Season's Greetings

I Loves My Job!

I apologize for all the cursing...both in the video and here.

I am a vile heathen.

...but you knew this already.

So anyway...there I am...minding my own damned business jammin' to some groovy tunes and bein' cool...barreling (safely) down an Ohio mountain when my eagle eyes spot a large obstruction in my lane.

Some Buckeye asshole has decided, "This is as good a place as any, Virgil.  Go ahead and heave great grandma's filthy, stained, Pall Mall stench-ridden Barca-Lounger out of the truck."

It sits in my lane at the convergence of two interstates.

I look to see if I can swerve to the left lane around the large object, but I have cars there.

No dice...I'm gonna have to swerve right into the merge ramp of the other interstate...or blast what looks to be a heavy object with my truck.

Homie don't blast nuthin' if homie don't got to.

I head and mirror check to my right.

Homie don't gotta blast nuthin.'

Victory!

I am a stone-cold truck drivin' badass!

Right?

Easy there, Sparky.

The day ain't over...

I know.

We truck drivers talk to ourselves.

A lot.

We are insane.

And yes...I know most cops don't monitor CB radio any more.

It was worth a shot.

__________ 

Here's a blowout that happened just six days prior the the one above!

About the only notable thing in this video is the Buckeye stinkbug walking across the hood after I get it pulled over.

I know.

I suck.

The good news?  I now have eight new drive tires and two new steer tires.

Damn thing drives like a Cadillac now. 

The boss loves me.

Maybe.

Way To Go Ohio

Evening rush hour on Cincinnati's north side.

The Chevy Cavalier and the Scion (?) in front of me in the middle lane are doing 55mph in a 65mph zone.

I see their stupidity in plenty of time, signal, check my mirrors, and move over to the right lane.

Then THIS happens!

686 confirmed Ohio graveyard-dead traffic fatalities in 2015 (so far).

Gee.  I wonder why?

686 dead folks is a lot of dead folks.  

Think about it. 

The idiot didn't.

American Butchery For Profit

This is an actual graphic from the website of a stem-cell research company (StemExpress) that buys harvested baby parts from Planned Parenthood.  I altered it slightly for balance and color.  Otherwise, text and graphics are unchanged.

I've said it before.

I am a very flawed believer.  I curse.  I covet.  I lust.  I kinda suck sometimes.

Anybody who knows me will tell you I am the furthest thing from being a "bible thumper."

Back when I was a virile young man, I considered it part of being a "man" to attempt to pollinate every willing female I would encounter. (not that there were many of those, BTW)

And if she got pregnant, I don't recall feeling any other real compunction to do anything other than "fix" the "problem" through an abortion.

Yes.  I was young and dumb and I was a heathen, but then something happened that change my worldview entirely.

My oldest sister and her husband got pregnant with their first child.

There were problems.  When it came time for the birth, the problems multiplied and it wasn't looking good.  I went to the hospital and saw the concern and worry in everyone's eyes.  It wasn't known if mother and child would make it.

The medical experts pulled out all the stops and made every effort to make sure child and mother lived.

They DID live.  Thankfully.  That child has grown to be an intelligent successful young woman with a family of her own.

This incident made me change my mind about abortion.  If so many talented people are willing to go to such great lengths to save innocent and helpless human life, then human life must be a very special thing and it should be protected.

In the back of my mind I think I always knew this was true, but I think I needed a kick in the ass to confirm it.

What was the difference between my sister's difficult pregnancy and others which end up in abortion?

From what I can tell, it is pretty much just a matter of want or desire.

If one wants the baby, then the baby is human and it will be taken care of properly.

If one doesn't want the baby, then it is nothing more than an inconvenient blob to be discarded.

Some say abortion is a choice or an option or a form of birth control or a women's health issue.

Birth control is condoms, the pill, early withdrawal, abstinence, or any other of the various contraceptive forms.  Once the sperm fertilizes the egg, it is a human life.  It's not a chicken or an elephant or a cat.

I've told my kids that if they are man or woman enough to stick it in or allow it to be stuck in unprotected, then they are man or woman enough to take responsibility for any human life they create.

We don't kill babies in this family.

__________

The Center For Medical Progress has been releasing jaw-dropping undercover videos from Planned Parenthood.

Watch them.  All of them.

If this is your idea of "choice," then you chose wrong. 

This is pure evil. If you disagree...and I don't care who you are...family, friend, whatever...you can unfriend me and be gone from my life forever. 

I want nothing to do with you.

Watch the video. 

All of it. 

That casserole dish was full of human arms, legs, eyes, fingers, toes, and lungs. You are a soulless ghoul if you think they didn't belong to a human being...a baby.

These satanic bastards act like it's cool, and treat these slaughtered innocents as if their dismembered bodies are used auto parts to be bought and sold.

Never before have I been so angered and saddened that something so inherently perverse can be taking place in a country I once so dearly loved.

Innocent and defenseless human life no longer has any value in this country. People are more upset about a gawd damned lion being poached.

There will be a horrible reckoning. 

Someday. Somehow.

I suppose abortion should be legal, safe, and available.

It should also be a rarity.

I'm pretty dumb, and I don't have all the answers.

But I'm sure what I've seen in these videos ain't it... 

A Dick Move: Interstate Merge fAle

I know.   Where the fuck I been at?  Not much posting.  Just dumb truck videos and "slogans."

Thanks for asking.

I'm fine. 

Busy working, and generally fed up with everything. 

Comes a point in a man's life when he's said just about all he can say.

Haven't even had the dash cam installed until two days ago.  I figured the displays of idiocy were getting kinda dull and I got tired of fucking with it.

Then this little gem popped up.

Un-fucking-believable what people do.

I'm wearing my ass out trying to stay alert and safe and (somewhat) courteous.

Y'all are makin' it hard on a brother.