Saturday, May 16, 2009

Part 18- My Fantastic Supreme 2009 Indy 500 Photo Diary Blog Type Thang: Zombies At Indy

I’ve seen a lot of things in my 40 plus years attending real and fast Indy 500 racing events.

I’ve seen heinous crashes, projectile vomiting, spirited fistfights, police brutality, rain of biblical proportions, public displays of affection and nudity, and abuse of exotic and illegal intoxicants.

Never did I think I would see the living dead amongst the throngs of enthusiastic Indy fans milling about the Vigoda Plaza area.

But that is exactly what I witnessed today.

There I was, minding my own damned business and sipping on a cold beer, when I looked up and saw four shadowy apparitions floating across the plaza.


Wheeler, Newby, Allison, and Fisher.

Four long-dead heartless conservative industrialists had returned from the grave.

They were hungry.

They needed to eat, and only live human brain matter would satisfy their ravenous appetite!

Knowing I had nothing to offer them, and seeing as I am afraid of no man…living or undead…I walked up to them and asked, “Which one of you is Fisher?”

The guy second from right in the photo above, said, “I am Fisher. Why do you ask, foolish mortal?”

I replied, “Because I went to your namesake elementary school…Carl G. Fisher School. That fact makes me a legendary Indy racing insider. Do you know where the school is?”

He replied that he did not know…

Having been tricked and made a fool of by a brainless mortal, he let loose a shriek of agony from the depths of his tomb, and he and all of his zombie buddies vanished into thin air, leaving behind only a small pile of smoldering dust…which was quickly swept up by the crack IMS Ecology Crew.

I returned to my cold beer and sat down and said to nobody in particular, “Dumbass poseur zombies….”


1 comment:

  1. Hey! I also went to Carl G Fisher Lead Paint and Asbestos-Laden Elementary School! And what a fine education was to be had there! What a Coincidence!


Feel free to comment away with your bad-ass selves.

Cursing and foul language is fine...even encouraged here. In fact, I think cussing is fucking wonderful.

Just remember...this is MY house, and I will not be insulted or maliciously messed with here.

Good-natured ribbing is cool, but if you and I don't have some kind of previous relationship, you had best mind your fucking manners or I will relegate you to the intardnets dustbin for being a cunt.

To know me is to love me.

Or something.