I'm thinking about trying the safety razor thing.
I started shaving with a Trac II. That's what I always used and was accustomed to.
When my boys started shaving, I was somehow "forced" to switch to another blade...this one with three blades in the head.
WTF? Three blades?
OK...so I finally got somewhat used to the three-blade shit, but yesterday I had to use a different one because I was out of the three blade heads.
Well...fuck me if this latest one didn't have like five or seven or twenty fucking blades in it!
What the fuck am I gonna do? Bush-hog the back forty?
Make a multitude of musloid snuff videos for YouTubes?
No, motherfuckers. I'm shaving.
Just shaving!
The head on this monstrosity is so wide it covers the entire area between my nose and my upper lip, so I can't even shave the area directly under my nostril openings without slicing my nose clean off and requiring the services of goonish government agents to save me from bleeding out in my almost nearly completed new bathroom.
I think that's it.
The hair and whisker removal industry is in cahoots with Marxist/lib/socialists to destroy this country.
It's a commie plot to make anybody who shaves dependent on government and make us weak and gay.
That settles it.
I'm definitely going to try the safety razor.
Cue Lee Greenwood.
God bless Amurica...
Monday, June 3, 2013
9 comments:
Feel free to comment away with your bad-ass selves.
Cursing and foul language is fine...even encouraged here. In fact, I think cussing is fucking wonderful.
Just remember...this is MY house, and I will not be insulted or maliciously messed with here.
Good-natured ribbing is cool, but if you and I don't have some kind of previous relationship, you had best mind your fucking manners or I will relegate you to the intardnets dustbin for being a cunt.
To know me is to love me.
Or something.
Maybe.
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I switched a couple years ago. The thing about a safety razor, and even more so with a cuthroat razor, is that it forces you to take your time. If you hurry, you will bleed. Keep a package of those 9-blade thingums around for when you need to shave in two minutes or less. Oh, an buy yourself a handful of styptic pencils.
ReplyDeleteBetter yet, just stop.
ReplyDeleteI gave up shaving circa 1969. Wife got over it. Daughter hasn't seen my face.
No expenses, no bleeding ... Happy Happy, Joy Joy.
Hans
in the NC woods
Cue Lee Greenwood.
DeleteGod bless Amurica...
:)!
See how easy it is to do a post everyday with that zoomie wit???????
ReplyDeleteYa I had a 4 bladed thingy sent in the mail a while back, the damn thing was huge...........;-)
Switched back to a DE razor some time ago, have not regretted it at all. Yes, it takes a little longer (don't even think of rushing it! - ask me how I know this..... ouch.....) but it's worth the effort and a damn sight cheaper than the multi-blade techno-slicers.
ReplyDeleteI re-started with a Merkur 42 (replica 1904 Gillette), and I'm using Merkur blades at the moment. I did try a Feather blade in the 1st week, and found out the hard way why the shaving advice forums say to stay clear until you're used to a DE razor again... more ouch, more mopping of blood off the sink.....
Very happy with mine now, especially since it was an "unwanted gift" bargain on Ebay!
Hey Zoomie, off topic, but if'n ya gots the time and inclination, could ya work some of your graphical magic fer lil' ol' me? I want a "Big Brass Balls" award to bestow on someone who truly has brass elephant balls. Hell, on anyone who has 'em. Mull it over, would ya?
ReplyDeleteSend me some ideas via my email in my profile.
DeleteBeen shaving with my Great Grandpa's Gillette Milord for about three years now...... Mever going back. It's a real freakin' machine.
ReplyDeleteStraight razor
ReplyDeletebuy a good one
Tall learning curve but all you need to buy is soap thereafter.