Friday, December 21, 2012
A Heart-Warming Yuletide Father/Son Talk
I had to take Number Two Son to high school today because his morning vocational classes were cancelled due to winter weather.
He is a cool kid.
He is handsome and smart and athletic and popular with the ladies.
In other words, he is nothing like me.
I don’t know where he gets it.
I need to have a talk with my wife.
Anyhoo…yesterday, apparently, his vocational school was put on “lock-down” because a business across the street was armed-robbed.
I said, “Cool! How did that go? Were you waiting for a disgruntled, short-dicked psychopath to hose down the school with an evil AR15?”
Number Two Son said, “It was funny. Earlier in the day we had a lock-down practice, and then later in the day we had a lock-down for real.”
He went on: “They had us shut off all the lights and computer monitors, lock the doors, and hide under our desks.”
I said sarcastically, “Oh really? Wait for the bullet like a helpless lamb and do nothing? How’s about bum-rush the motherfucker and stab him in the neck with a pencil? Or throw computer monitors at him? Anything but sit there and wait to die like an asshole…”
Number Two Son: “Yeah…Coach…(swim team coach and West Point/Army veteran, deer hunter, gun freak)…said we should assault through the ambush!”
I remarked, “Yep. Coach is exactly right…and he would know. Gang tackle the bastard and fuck him up something proper.”
At about that time, we arrived at his school, said our good-byes, and parted company.
It is this kind of intimate father/son moment that really brings a tear to the eye.
Touching, isn’t it?
at 12:09 PM