Monday, May 25, 2009

Part 27- My Fantastic Supreme 2009 Indy 500 Photo Diary Blog Type Thang: The Night Before The Indy 500

My last couple of days have been fun and exciting.

I will describe for you now why I think so.

Night-Before-The-Race festivities were a hoot.

My youngest son Willie and I arrived at my mom’s house in Speedway Saturday evening and set up our base of operations there.

Mom took care of us and fed us and did all those great things Moms do to make their children/grandchildren feel warm and welcomed.

Thanks, Mom!

Then, I took Willie on a little walkabout down Georgetown Road to witness all the debauchery because he’s old enough now, and I thought he should see the greatest collection of drunken fools in one place in the entire world.

I explained to Willie many of life’s mysteries and lessons during this time.

Here are a few selected tidbits of knowledge I shared with my young son:

1—If one is cool is these types of situations, one will not visit the county jail.
2—If one’s buddies act like fools, and you don’t stop the shenanigans or excuse yourself FROM them, you will go to jail WITH them.
3—Don’t mess with police officers. They are on our side.
4—If you don’t start nuthin,’ there won’t be nuthin.’
5—Jail is neither fun nor cool.
6—Do not pee out in public.
7—Be courteous to everyone until such time as it is required to stand your ground.
8—Trips to the hospital/emergency room are below average and should be avoided.
9—Over-consumption of alcohol can lead one to doing things one would not normally do.
10—It’s a big world, and one must know how to get along with different types of people.

Yes…it was a teaching opportunity, and Willie is a good student.

We stopped at Ziggy’s house and watched the idiots pee in his yard.

Willie played with Ziggy’s puppy, and then we took a thrilling joyride in Ziggy’s hotrod Plymouth Barracuda… which is just about the coolest car ever created by human hands!

It was hot and noisy and violent and it made Willie and I have feces-consuming grins!

When we were done thrashing the classic American muscle car, I told Ziggy that he had just used up all of his Carbon Credits for the next year or so.

Our beloved President would be sad and disappointed.


Then, Willie and I went to Camp 'N' Brew, and we watched more besotted individuals.

I explained the proper procedures and customs for the handing out of Mardi Gras beads, and Willie got his first glance ever at mature female breast assemblies!

I am a bad dad.

Willie and I spoke at length with Shane Rogers, who is a young and legendary racing insider from Australia.

Shane was amazed with the scope of all things Indy, and was eagerly anticipating the race the next day.

Shane is a cool dude, and he now knows what Indy means.

Cheers, mate!

Then, Willie and I stumbled back to Mom’s house, got a good night’s sleep, and prepared for the next day…my Christmas…the Indy 500 baby!

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